Stuck in the Moment (for how long?)

8:36.

Tick.

8:36.

Tick.

8:36.

Tick.

I’m not sure how long I sat in my office, journaling and reading, while the wall clock in my office marked the steady passing of time. Or so I thought.

It wasn’t until I looked up to gauge if I had time for a short meditation that I realized there was something not quite right with the clock I bought a few years ago at the thrift store. It was awfully dark out at 8:36 in the morning.

Tick.

8:36.

That’s when I realized it was stuck on the minute. The minute hand was moving, jumping in one second intervals, but never really changing. It was reliving the second over and over again. Forever stuck at 8:36.

Realizing the power to change the moment was within my hands, I pulled the clock off the wall and removed the battery. I figured it needed a recharge or at least some tender loving care to help move it past the 8:36 minute mark.

While the AA was on the wall charger, I couldn’t help but wonder how often was I stuck on one moment. One instant. One incident. One sliver of life without the ability to move forward, despite the never-ending passage of time. How often do I get marred into old emotions, narratives, that no longer have a purpose? How often do I rehash past conversations, events or even regrets.

When do we let go and move forward? How does one get unstuck? Removed from the wall and recharged?

Obviously being stuck has offered my mind some sort of safety, comfort zone. However, upon reflection while staring at the dismantled clock in my office, I realized it only keeps me from doing the hard stuff in life.

I believe the answer lies in the moment. When the “sticky” moments occur, it is necessary to confront the hard emotions and step into the difficult conversation. Otherwise, I spend many moments after the moment rehashing, building resentment and securing my boundaries that push others away.

Taking a moment to notice the hard moments and deal with them in that moment will seize to consume me in that moment for moments to come.

Or something like that.

Looks like being stuck on 8:36 was a bit of a recharge for both the clock and myself.

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